This is a busy Friday…mulling whether to resume my illustrious investment banking career via an offer (well, an almost offer) that isn’t exactly to my liking…and it’s options expiration day (my favorite day of the month)…and there’s a Saved By The Bell Marathon on TBS…Dammit, why does everything happen at once?
“Fork” – ah, that word brings back memories – and not just from my reality show concept (originally envisioned as a pay-per-view long before “reality tv” existed) FingerFork, either. When I was but a brash teenager, the girls at our high school would regularly meet in the mornings for a nice meal and to dish about their various levels of hotness, the virtues of maintaining ones’ chastity and what to do about climate changes in the rainforests of Costa Rica. This was the late 1980’s, so they cleverly labeled this gathering “The Breakfast Club.” (Insert horkhorkhork sound here). They even posed for a group picture in the yearbook under this dubious monicker.
This simply would not stand. Together with the appropriate friends, we started a competing organization. However, we did not hold regular meetings or discuss important topics. All we really did was pose for a yearbook picture and lay out the common values of the members of our group. Quirksome. Quick-witted (allegedly). Quantitative (stretching ourselves). Umm, what was the last one? Q-bert? Fuck, I don’t recall, but there were four qualities that all started with “Q” – get it? “Four Q”s? The 4 Q Crew – now that was genius. Well, at least it passed for genius when you were 17. It was a simpler time, ya’ll. Anyhoo, we got our competing picture in the annual. I do not believe that the members of “The Breakfast Club” ever understood that “The 4 Q Crew” was intended to be a scathing parody of them and their collective self-importance, possibly because self-awareness was not a strong suit for anyone in their late teens. (At least I got in one last picture of me sporting my two-tone, non-Guess denim jacket. Was that thing from Chessking? It was cool as hell.)
You know what’s pretty sweet about having this website thing going for almost nine months? Now, when I’m trying to to remember the permalink for the “reality tv ideas” post, I can just google “FingerFork”. Now, granted, I have to use quotes, but still, that shit is etched onto somebody’s servers for eternity. Sweet. There for posterity , beeyotches – posterity. Same with a search for “top candy bars” – wpz is all up in that bizness. Do candy bars have much to do with the rest of this disparate-collection-of-posts-and-nonsense website? Nope. But it’s all about POSTERITY. And I even created a word. Tierarchy. It’s right there on the googs, bro, so you know it’s legit. Fuck working for the man, it’s all about helping out the posterity and all. /stream of consciousness
Next week, I will delve into some of life’s mysteries…one, is Lady Gaga hot? Moderately attractive? Heinous? Opinions vary greatly….this new song (her anthem protesting the inequities of socialized medicine) is pretty good, I like most songs in which the artists incorporate their names significantly into the lyrics…
Til we meet again,