Getting Resolute

Getting Resolute

Glad to be back in NYC and out of that forever-75-degree hellhole, Los Angeles.  An endless stream of delicious mexican food – chili verde as far as the eye can see – who would ever want to live there?  You’d always feel bad about not going for a run outside and would have to spend considerable time on the golf course and by the pool.  Ick…  Dammit.

Anyway, I’m back in action.  Wall Street bonus season is here, and I expect the public outcry to be loud and sustained.  I predict at least one “banker” will be attacked by one of the outraged many.  This “banker” will most likely be a bank teller, but remember me when the incident is all over the airwaves.  In some ways I feel a little bad about not going back to work on the Street given the (unforeseen by me) immediate return of pay to nosebleed levels.  But then I remember how much I hated the day-to-day travel, stress, bitching, constant exposure to assholes, etc. and recall how I have none of those issues now and can do whatever I want (except eat decent chili verde, why does NYC mexican food suck so much?).  So I will be an interested bystander for bonus season; I suppose if there is a stampede for my services I will have to consider my options, but having been out of the game for 13 months I’m probably a better fit for a YUM Brands outfit.

If you are wondering what the point of this entry is, I will save you a little time: there is no point.  I’m having a little bit of the old writer’s block – I think this is attributable to that fucking New Year’s party.  I’m almost certain I still couldn’t pass a breathalyzer.  Actually, I guess the point of this is to provide a (late) list of my New Year’s Resolutions.  That makes sense given the title and all.  I make resolutions infrequently, but one of my best years ever was 1993 when my only resolution was to listen to more Billy Idol.  Ironically, the spectre of Billy I led to less, rather than more, dancing with myself.  So I’m gonna fire some up for 2010.

Chilly’s 2010 New Year’s Resolutions

1. Spend zero hours in a casino (virtual or brick and mortar). In 2009, I basically acted like a 17 year old on perpetual summer vacation, who had access to a great expense account.  This year, I’m gonna up the ante and act a little more responsible, somewhere in the twenty to twenty-one year old range.  This is no layup, as I fucking love casinos, but they just amplify my vices too dramatically: way too much drinking, yelling, second hand smoking (I’ve prob got the lungs of a three pack a day guy after spending basically a full month of 2009 in casinos), an easing of my risk tolerance profile.  I’m gonna try and be a little more productive – maybe even a little commercial – this year.

The fucking casinos aren’t making it easy though, offering to fly me to New Orleans for Mardi Gras, weeklong cruises, more Vegas tempations.  Arrgh.

2. Learn to moonwalk. People are always giving me shit for being a dorky white guy, learning to MW will certainly tilt the scales of coolness back in my favor.  Plus, it will give me more cause to wear the fucking $500 ferragamos that are chillin in the closet.  They provide effectively the same traction as socks.

3. Give some dough to charity.  I’m trying to take my trading more seriously this year and as such plan to give 5% of my monthly profits to a charity of some sort.  (If I lose money in a given month, I’ll go outside and harass some homeless guys to reimburse 5% of my losses.)

4.  Invest a little more time in wastedpo. It’s harder than you think to maintain a website, sometimes you have to bust out some stream of consciousness crap like this just to eke out a post.  I averaged almost exactly three posts per week for 2009 which was something of an accomplishment – most websites like this (that aren’t link-based and have no clear focus) don’t seem to make it much longer than three months.  I need this friggin writer’s block to clear though if I wanna maintain 3x – right now, I am struggling.

Fries with cheese curds and gravy? Fuckin A, Canada - nice work! Will make #7 tougher, but worth it for the sake of #5

5. Be more tolerant of Canadians. As an olive branch, I plan to try some poutine and Tim Horton’s.  I won’t make the ultimate sacrifice and learn about hockey, so I will never be able to participate in 100% of Canadian conversations, but the cheese/gravy fries and donut combo should prep me for about 50% of Canuck topics.

6.  Watch less Gary, Unmarried. Our DVR will not friggin quit recording it.  You are not the boss of me, DVR.  (And has a show ever changed its set up so much after one season?  Jaime King and Ed Begley were not the problem, CBS.  Jaime King is rarely the problem.)

7.  Be less unhealthy, in general. I’m not going to set some unrealistic goals like “lose 30 pounds” or “do a pullup.”  In 2009 I worked out quite a lot, but my physical condition actually deteriorated.  Why?  One, I’m old as shit and there’s nowhere to go but down.  Two, having two bottles of wine after hitting the gym for a robust three mile run kind of mutes the impact of the run.  A little more booze moderation will help and in conjunction with resolution #1 will hopefully keep me out of the hospital (especially since I may have no insurance soon!)

8.  Stop my practice of assuming of immediately that everyone is an idiot. This does not extend to people I already know, of course.  Most of them have already proven my hypothesis correct.  But I’m gonna try and give strangers a little bit more of the benefit of my doubt.  Unfortunately, people like the 17-minute-Chipotle-orderer I ran into today are already making this one tough.

Should be a page turner

9.  Read The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. Everyone has been telling me how great it is; I tried reading this last year and was pretty confused given that about 73 different names were introduced in the first chapter.  When I’m reading, it takes me some serious time to visualize a person to associate with a name, so give me a gradual character introduction process and it’s manageable.  Also, that shit about flowers was boring – more girls, more tattoos, more dragons.

10.  Figure out where I put The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. SO has about 11,532 books on her bookshelves, so I cannot be sure it’s not there somewhere.  But I’ve looked a few times, and I don’t see that fucker.

Gotta get through this,

Chilly17, wasted potential (z)

4 thoughts on “Getting Resolute

  1. C-17, you already broke #8.

    I am calling out the NY resolution police and I submit the following “lab report” for the Chilly files.

    Hypothesis: Chilly will write anything on his site to boost Megan Fox traffic from google

    Situation: At the Chelsea NYSC yesterday doing some low impact cardio as a prelude to putting on my incredible hulk demonstration on the leg sled. Whether or not my ample buttocks were teaming with a fine bead of perspiration is irrelevant

    C-17 Action: Chilly rolls up with a smirk and yells to the crowd, “jeesus chriasst doooode, you’ll fit into your jean shorts in no time”

    Analysis: Without understanding the full context of the events, he has deliberately assumed that he is smarter than everyone and everyone is an idiot (violation of #8). Chilly, you are a b%tch. Akin to someone who watches the epic 1987 movie robocop and yells out in the theatre, jesus christ dude, that cyborg shits pudding, only to ignore Robocop’s greater role in the re-shaping of Detroit’s inner city way of life in the late 80’s

  2. DS1 – Allow me to respond.

    C-17, you already broke #8.

    1. Megan Fox is so last year and Google Image search traffic blows. I am now getting more inbound traffic from goatee fans calling me an idiot and telling me all about their important jobs as the manager of the Hertz kiosk in Louisville.

    2. “Leg sled” is about the gheyest shit I’ve ever heard.

    3. If you are rocking the elliptical machine in a spandex bodysuit, you subject yourself to criticism.

    4. I clearly stated in my resolutions list that I wasn’t going to pre-judge strangers and that most of the people that I already know had failed the dumbassness litmus test.

    5. You know you rock the jean shorts, it’s your look. No one looks better rollerblading. If mullets were legal in banking I’m sure you’d add that to your reportoire.

    6. Don’t invoke Robocop. Seriously.

  3. I have two copies of The Girl With The Dragon Tatoo in case you can’t find yours. You just have to get through the first 100 pages – after that you won’t be able to put it down.
    The Girl Who Played With Fire is even better. If you’re nice, I’ll let you borrow it.

  4. Thanks, but why do you have two copies of the same book? Were you afraid you were going to read it so hard that it would spontaneously combust or something?

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