I Just Saw Luke Wilson In My Bathroom

I Just Saw Luke Wilson In My Bathroom

Seriously, that dude is suddenly omnipresent.  Chillin on the couch, watching That 70’s Show – there’s ElDub romancing Donna as Kelso’s older brother, Casey.  Boom – Wilsoned.  Commercial – isn’t that Luke Wilson playing horse and shilling for AT&T?  Boom – Wilsoned.  Switch over to TBS – Old School.  Wilsoned.  Commercial for Death At A Funeral – the cast of which is apparently 90% African-American – surely I’m not about to get – boom, Wilsoned.  Fuck it, let me watch The Soup, LW is pretty chill so I’m certainly safe from him here.  There’s David Koechner doing a bit (a terrible bit), what’s he there for anyway?  Oh, promoting a shitty direct-to-video flick.  Tenure.

There's no fucking escape from ElDub

Boom.  Wilsoned.   It seems like the all-out marketing assault is about 12 years too late here.  I thought Wilson had some leading-man potential after catching Bottle Rocket back in ’96, but most of the artistic kudos for that flick went to laid-back brother/writer/actor Owen and quirky director Wes Anderson.  At first glance, it looked like Luke’s catatonic performance was a nuanced portrayal of clinical depression in action (or inaction).  As his career has unfolded, it turns out that catatonic is his acting style, basically a monotone, lobotomized everyman.  He’s been in like 300 movies, some of which are even pretty good (based on his unwarranted inclusion in that Ferrell comedy crew), but what’s his signature role?  The boring straight man in Old School?  The boring love interest in Legally Blonde?  Honestly, I think the least boring I’ve seen the guy is in That 70s Show.  (Although Rushmore certainly rules, I only vaguely recall LW’s boring surgeon.  But I do remember Max Fischer’s response to hearing that LW went to Harvard: “Oh that’s great. I wrote a hit play and directed it, so I’m not sweating it either.”)

I’m not sure what ElDub was doing in my bathroom, he probably thought it was an open mike night or maybe the greenroom for an upcoming Qdoba commercial.  I’ll probably never know, he took off right after I walked in.  But, Luke, if you’re reading this, here’s a suggestion: cut back on the visibility a smidge?  You’re diluting the brand.  Thanks.

Notes from the field: As you may have noticed, there have been fewer posts the last couple weeks as I dealt with records for the tax man.  It’s getting to be summer though, so I’ll be cutting back a little bit so I can work on my tan.  People read less of the internetz during the summer anyhow, so it should be a net wash.  I’m strongly considering an NFL draft live blog for Thursday night, particularly since my boyz have the 13th and 17th picks (Hayden and Davis, I’m guessing).  I am even somewhat pondering getting off my ass and going to Radio City and doing the shit on location.  That’s probably tough given all the other stuff I have going on.



6 thoughts on “I Just Saw Luke Wilson In My Bathroom

  1. Seriously? Might take a look when it hits ondemand, i am generally okay with koechner if he’s in a slightly toned-down mode. I’ll just stay away from tv for a few days before so I my ElDub tolerance will be up.

  2. Yeah Koechner is toned down in this one. Good understated comedy. Much better than the stupid dvd cover would suggest.

  3. Diddy – I’m glad you asked. I’m currently planning to do a series of erotic videos with your mom. The videos will be well-lit but tasteless, and available through all the usual channels. The work itself is for shit but the benefits are amazing, particularly the medical. (I saw your mom’s list of preexisting conditions – you should call her to verify that your dad is really your dad, apparently she really gets around.)

    You do bring up a good question though, which will lead to a new post….

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.