This site has been around for over two years now – I can’t even remember 75% of the stuff that I’ve put on here at this point – and gets a fair amount of inbound traffic from the search engines. Most of the searches are for such important topics as “top candy bars,” “ugly baby fnl,” or “gaga poetry,” but I get a bit of “long tail” search traffic. ”Long tail,” in the parlance of SEO experts, means “weird shit that people type in google that somehow leads back to your site.” Take a look.
50 Random Search Terms That Somehow Led People Here in April/May
(My comments in parentheses where appropriate, like right here)
1. why is my urine the same color as red bull (I don’t believe I typed this after last Friday night, but I certainly could/should have)
2. fiery habanero doritos dipped in cream cheese (Fodder for a future column)
3. grave cereal
4. will micronauts ever come back (One can hope)
5. banking ties brooks eurotrash
6. mom wins drinking contest (Good job, Mom)
7. solitary drinking games (I have seen this numerous times – hilarious or sad?)
8. in the girl with the dragon tattoo was the lead actress anally raped? (Between this and all the “funyuns anal leakage” searches I’m starting to feel typecast)
9. americas best dance crew ticker symbol
10. office edicate bluetooth heads set
11. shia labeouf screech
12. chantix and wine
13. paralyzed by the exaggerated bling (Look away then)
14. is cat deeley a complete bitch? (Bite your fucking tongue)
15. half shirt breakdance (Chelsea gym member, no doubt)
16. is it okay to eat funyuns if you have high cholestrol
17. spencer pratt investment banker -hills -montag
18. eddie munster s hairline
19. taco bell mesh shorts (Fantastic idea)
20. wasted potential running shirts (Also solid)
21. could i be a foot model (I certainly could)
22. honey badger buttons (I don’t recommend pushing them)
23. ode to sheneneh
24. drinking game for the movie hoosiers
25. kristen wiig smoking pipe
26. gq running brioni he knows a guy at the label
27. what is carly foulkes motivation? (Not sure, but I’m guessing being hot and making money?)
28. what does wasabi kit kat taste like (I see this a lot, too – it tastes like fucking wasabi-laced KitKat, okay?)
29. joe rogan newsradio unabomber
30. the running man too violent (The movie or the dance?)
31. jeremy piven full frontal (Why? And how the hell did you get directed here???)
32. del scorcho vs. del inferno (Scorcho for taste, inferno for heat)
33. what font is used for charvet
34. natalie portman works out
35. elizabeth perkins fucking
36. lady gag as anti pants movement (Interesting typo, works a few different ways)
37. omar little bastard (I hope this is trying to find Kenard, he was the little bastard)
38. im not a great conversationalist
39. craps giger beer (These are a few of my favorite things)
40. best drinking games with the ipad
41. how many cabs in a chick-o-stick (Sounds like a Nice N Smooth jam)
42. zooey deschanel aspergers
43. drink his bathwater that would be nice (For who?)
44. i cant hit 80 mph baseballs
45. malt liquor martini
46. trends in pubic hair (Mention it once in your website, suddenly you’re an expert)
47. jenny eat something (Always double down on 11)
48. the wash sale rule is a fucking joke (Preaching to the choir, brother)
49. everyone thinks i m great except my ex
50. were flamin hot cheetos ever purple
Later,
Chilly17
